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Sara McNeill died this weekend
***WARNING IF THIS IS GONNA MAKE YOU DEPRESSED OR WHATNOT, DO NOT READ***
She was on a retreat for CCD. She had an aneurysm, went into cardiac arrest, and died. The school set up the Media Center (library) as a room where you could just go to help deal with this, with guidance counselors and even drinks and brownies and cookies. Ally was really bad (she was at the retreat and had just talked to Sara). 'Manda and me stayed with her basically all first half of day (up till lunch bout, little less 'an that as she went home). We were there with Emily too (Sara'd been her best friend through elementary). I never really knew Sara, but there were SO many people there, so many grieving her and so many more not there at that time. So so many. As I said, I never really knew her, but I just figured her for one of the basically ok preps, kinda annoying at times just cuz. She was never mean, never anything like that. After listening to everyone talk, though, I can see that she was so so so much more. Her favorite color was purple, and she loved to read (mainly fantasy) and her passion was painting. She was brilliant at it. The girl was gorgeous and, I guess, just wonderful.
She didn't deserve this. She just..... didn't, and it's just wrong somehow. I guess it always is. But she had such a future before her, such an everything. I never really cared bout her while she was at school; I'd never had even heard of her had she not been in a few of my classes. But she was, and Ally knew her. And Emily knew her. And Kayla I think. And so many others. And I feel SO much for them.
Sara, I know I never really knew you, just figured u as one of "them" and never really gave a damn, but I see now that you really were a great person. Seriously, a GREAT person and u did NOT deserve this fate. You deserved so much more and I'm SO sorry to everyone for the loss. I just hope whereever u r, if there is an afterlife, that u're happy. U deserve to be happy. I don't necessarily wish I'd gotten to know you more, though that would have been nice. I think we might've gotten along together pretty well, but then again, it's just as likely we wouldn't have. Prolly casual friends/acquaintences at best. But still, I do grieve ur loss even if it won't take me NEARLY as long as others, and SO many others do too.
God, this is so hard to adjust to, to accept. She's gone, really gone. She won't be in my classes, even if only as another of the random people out there that I dun care all that much bout but is still there. Goddammit, y the hell is life so fucking unfair?!
Sara, I just REALLY REALLY hope u're happy out there, wherever u r, and that ur life was rich, to the fullest, the best possible. I really and truly hope for all of that with you, because it's what you deserved. It's what all of us deserve.
And today, it just all got me thinking. What would happen if I died, what would happen if my friends died. I doubt I'd have nearly as much mourners as Sara, but that doesn't really matter. I would NEVER want to put anyone through that pain, and besides that, I just don't want to die. No matter the hardships or whatever, I truly want to live. As for what if one of my friends died, damn, there are so many of you that I wouldn't be able to function without. You guys mean the world to me, and I love you all, and I hope you know that. I really do.
Yup, and that's basically it. You'll be missed SO much Sara, and I guess this is my token of goodbye maybe. I dunno if I'm going to the funeral; it depends on whether Ally goes or not. I'll go for her.
You're loved, Sara, and you're missed, and you'll live on (cliched phrase but who cares) in the hearts and memories of so many others, in your paintings, in your things, in your clothes, in how you were so gorgeous, so graceful, so poised. You'll live on. You'll live on.
Yup, and I'm done now guys. So.... yeah.
Ta mates.
She was on a retreat for CCD. She had an aneurysm, went into cardiac arrest, and died. The school set up the Media Center (library) as a room where you could just go to help deal with this, with guidance counselors and even drinks and brownies and cookies. Ally was really bad (she was at the retreat and had just talked to Sara). 'Manda and me stayed with her basically all first half of day (up till lunch bout, little less 'an that as she went home). We were there with Emily too (Sara'd been her best friend through elementary). I never really knew Sara, but there were SO many people there, so many grieving her and so many more not there at that time. So so many. As I said, I never really knew her, but I just figured her for one of the basically ok preps, kinda annoying at times just cuz. She was never mean, never anything like that. After listening to everyone talk, though, I can see that she was so so so much more. Her favorite color was purple, and she loved to read (mainly fantasy) and her passion was painting. She was brilliant at it. The girl was gorgeous and, I guess, just wonderful.
She didn't deserve this. She just..... didn't, and it's just wrong somehow. I guess it always is. But she had such a future before her, such an everything. I never really cared bout her while she was at school; I'd never had even heard of her had she not been in a few of my classes. But she was, and Ally knew her. And Emily knew her. And Kayla I think. And so many others. And I feel SO much for them.
Sara, I know I never really knew you, just figured u as one of "them" and never really gave a damn, but I see now that you really were a great person. Seriously, a GREAT person and u did NOT deserve this fate. You deserved so much more and I'm SO sorry to everyone for the loss. I just hope whereever u r, if there is an afterlife, that u're happy. U deserve to be happy. I don't necessarily wish I'd gotten to know you more, though that would have been nice. I think we might've gotten along together pretty well, but then again, it's just as likely we wouldn't have. Prolly casual friends/acquaintences at best. But still, I do grieve ur loss even if it won't take me NEARLY as long as others, and SO many others do too.
God, this is so hard to adjust to, to accept. She's gone, really gone. She won't be in my classes, even if only as another of the random people out there that I dun care all that much bout but is still there. Goddammit, y the hell is life so fucking unfair?!
Sara, I just REALLY REALLY hope u're happy out there, wherever u r, and that ur life was rich, to the fullest, the best possible. I really and truly hope for all of that with you, because it's what you deserved. It's what all of us deserve.
And today, it just all got me thinking. What would happen if I died, what would happen if my friends died. I doubt I'd have nearly as much mourners as Sara, but that doesn't really matter. I would NEVER want to put anyone through that pain, and besides that, I just don't want to die. No matter the hardships or whatever, I truly want to live. As for what if one of my friends died, damn, there are so many of you that I wouldn't be able to function without. You guys mean the world to me, and I love you all, and I hope you know that. I really do.
Yup, and that's basically it. You'll be missed SO much Sara, and I guess this is my token of goodbye maybe. I dunno if I'm going to the funeral; it depends on whether Ally goes or not. I'll go for her.
You're loved, Sara, and you're missed, and you'll live on (cliched phrase but who cares) in the hearts and memories of so many others, in your paintings, in your things, in your clothes, in how you were so gorgeous, so graceful, so poised. You'll live on. You'll live on.
Yup, and I'm done now guys. So.... yeah.
Ta mates.
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